When Praise is a Sacrifice

Today, October 15th, is a day of remembrance.

Two days ago, Canadians celebrated Thanksgiving with friends, family and great food. But today is different.

It's a day I wouldn't have paid much attention to if it weren't for an event that happened in my life just over a year ago.

I never imagined having to count myself as 'one of them' - the group of women with soul connections on this day.

October 15th marks the 'Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day'

As mentioned on the official website, back in October 1988, American President Ronald Reagan proclaimed October as National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. He sensitively said, ''When a child loses a parent, they are called an orphan. When a spouse loses her or his partner, they are called a widow or widower. When parents lose their child, there isn't a word to describe them.''

And as one of those parents, I realize there also isn't a word to describe one's emotions when you lose a child.

Yes, I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby boy 3 months ago. But on August 6, 2013, I also buried a baby after suffering a miscarriage at 8 weeks.

Since then, 5 friends of mine have unfortunately had to do the same.

How does one reconcile thanksgiving and trial? Love and loss? Praise and pain?

Hebrews 13:15 talks about offering God a 'sacrifice of praise.' Oh, how you and I know that praise isn't always easy. How many days is it a decision we have to make instead of a natural response flowing from our hearts?

Tim Hughes' song, ''When the Tears Fall'', is a powerful summary of the struggles and questions I was left with after my miscarriage. But it's also an intense reminder of hope, an invitation to look up.

I've had questions without answers
I've known sorrow, I have known pain
But there's one thing that I cling to
You are faithful, Jesus You're true
When hope is lost
I call You Saviour
When pain surrounds
I call You Healer
When silence falls
You'll be the song within my heart

I'm not trying to minimize anyone's pain by saying that we should just 'get over' such experiences, that we're not allowed to ask questions, or that we need to suck it up and be 'spiritual'. No, mourning IS spiritual (a whole book of the Bible is all about lamenting!)

But for me it is significant that this day of loss and remembrance falls two days after Thanksgiving. Because I can still be thankful, and praise God even when it's hard.

Praise Him for the fact that I'm not alone, since He is familiar with suffering.
Praise Him for hope.
Praise Him for life.
Praise Him for Shalom - that all-encompassing, deep, healing, life-giving peace and comfort.

Maybe you haven't lost a child, but maybe praise is still a sacrifice for you.  Maybe it's sickness, disappointment, stress, doubt.

But may I encourage you to offer a praise sacrifice even in your suffering?

And friend, if you've lost a little one, let us remember together. Know that Jesus sees your tears and is ready to offer beauty for ashes.